Tips to Help with Emotional Regulation in our Kids
by Linda Meredith
I've just literally come from shopping at the mall where a couple with two kids allowed one of their children to continually cry non stop and repeat over and over again "I want the toys." Not in a whiny, spoilt brat voice, in a genuine, heartfelt, I'm really crying because the adult won't stop and listen to me voice. It broke my heart.
The young child was around 4, the younger sibling around 3, and when the older one stopped the younger had a half hearted attempt to cry too, then the older one started at full blast again. Nic was with me at the time and we talked about how the kids might be tired, it's the end of a long day and so forth. What really challenged me was the parental lack of attention to the distressed child.
Why would you not stop and talk to your child, why would you casually stroll along like nothing in the world is wrong, and I mean casually stroll out of the shops. Maybe it's just me, maybe I'm too sensitive to kids who are emotional? My line of thought is if we aren't the ones who teach our kids to emotionally regulate then who will?
Teachers are spending hours of their time to become equipped to help kids in the classroom to emotionally regulate. They're right at the forefront of learning what needs to be taught at home from day one. As parents I believe we're responsible for teaching our kids to emotionally regulate even if we don't have the terms right, the understanding in front of us or the professional skills.
As a parent we go to any lengths for our kids. To that end I'm going to include a number of infographics in this blog post and your goal as a Parent, a Grandparent, a Caregiver, a responsible Adult, is to take on board this information, ask questions and to seek MORE information about how to implement this into your life, and the lives of the children around you.
There are plenty of online resources, us them. There are plenty of professionals who can help, use them. There are even plenty of resources for free and for purchase ONLINE that you can set up and use at home. I will be implementing these resources when I have grandchildren, absolutely. Learning doesn't stop just because I didn't learn it growing up, nor did I learn it with my kids from professionals, I taught myself. Stubborn like that!
Let's do this and be the one next step that changes the world together.
This is why we make the time to include emotional regulation in our kids lives. It impacts the developing brain.
Us this infographic to put an order in place. Plan an activity, practice it repeatedly and evaluate how it works for you and your child each time. Adapt as time goes on and different milestones are achieved. Get an app on Milestones for your child to help you know what part of the brain is developing at any given point in time.
We did this with my Goddaughter. We literally helped her move her legs to walk as she was ready to learn. In no time she was up and around because we helped her access that part of her brain. Our brain doesn't come wired to know how to walk we learn it. The same goes for emotional regulation, we learn the skill.
Do you have these skills yourself? Do you need to learn them so you can teach your children?
Use the suggestions on this chart to help you create more ideas for your children too OR to ask more questions to lead you in new directions.
Use Pinterest for LOTS of ideas and infographics on self regulation and more. Great for making your own at home and the kids can help you as well.
Use Google to find Self Regulation tools already preprepared for you.
Here's some prepared options I found -
Here's a complete article about Self Regulation -
May you continue to ask questions, seek the answers you need and know that everything you do is priceless.
Blessings and dreams,