How to Experience Who I Am
#complexptsd This quote helps to understand why we have to have a level of personal awareness. Changing habits won't be maintained unless or until we can be fully present and aware of who I am, now, today, in this moment. When trauma comes from childhood abuse we grow up automatically falling into the role of being who everyone else wants us to be. As we are mindful of our reactions under stress we can recognise the responses that align with who we are as opposed to who we have had to be.
We don't need to go any further than our reactions to our families. Those moments you smile on the outside and want to scream on the inside, yes, you know them. Your truth is you're not happy, and the layers of the unhappiness as we unpack them and learn new responses more in line with our nature helps us to break free from trauma responses.
Yes, it's hard, but it's worth it. We need to break the silence within ourselves first, own our thoughts and feelings, value them for where they will lead us. Learn to say I'm not ready to make a decision about this yet instead of always saying yes to everyone and everything. Our lives are just as valuable, our needs just as worthy of our attention.
Think about when you travel on a plane. You have to put your mask on first, then the child. Our lives are the same. If we hope to live through them fulfilled we need to put what we need first in order that we can have enough energy and love to help others. This is the reality of healing from trauma. If we don't do this process we will continue to say yes to everyone and everything and never unpack the vital source of love, life and laughter that is there waiting for us.
Let's do this, together.