Faster Is Not The Answer
If there’s one thing I’ve pulled my hair out over during this recovery to remission process it’s this. Why can’t I be well now. Heck, not even now, why can’t I be well yesterday?
The reality hit me one day. It took generations before me and years of my life for all this to manifest into me losing the ability to get out of bed. Literally, it effected my brain. The emotional trauma, the sexual abuse, the divorce, witnessing physical abuse, and so much more, didn’t manifest in my life overnight.
Rather, I left the family home and I got on with living my life. I was happy, working, playing softball and mens baseball. Loving playing tennis and moving around the country. Literally, the downhill decline didn’t begin until I had the courage to ask questions, begin looking for answers, then a year after my 3rd child was born, bam!
So no, I wasn’t going to become well overnight. Mental health challenges, and especially complex mental health challenges, don’t disappear overnight. We walk this path literally each day. Learning how to manage so many aspects of our lives and beginning to live authentically.
Living authentically saved my life. If I hadn’t known who I was before the final crunch that left me bedridden, unable to walk or talk and needing a full time carer, I’d still be there. Consistency is what has made it all possible. A commitment to myself that every day I’ll work out what I can and can’t do, increase the output, and take good care of myself.
No one can do it for us. We, however, can take back our authentic life and live it, literally bloom where we are planted. We’ve got this!